Theme 09: Aeva - Week 2

T'is Monday again, the day I try and catch up with all my responsibilities. It'll be an interesting week as Thursday I have a job interview, and next week Monday my driving exam that I really really need to pass or I won't be driving by end September anymore. So yeah, totally no stress << XD

In the meantime some writing has occurred, not so much drawing. Trying to find some balance between the two while still going forward with both. There are not enough hours in a day to do everything. XD

And, I've gotten my hands on the Final Fantasy X remaster and I have to say: I am enjoying that game far more now than I did 10 years ago. Okay, they clearly made huge adjustments to the facial expressions (coming from PS2, it says a lot!) and the music remaster is to die for... but the story itself hasn't changed. I guess I have. Or, rather, the story now speaks to me in ways it couldn't way back when because I didn't have my own stories planned out. As death is an essential component in them, it only makes sense FFX has drawn me in like never before. I'm also less prone to quit when a boss kicks my ass several times in a row << XD (Seymour Flux made me quit the game way back when). Now I've reached Zanarkand and a plot twist I recall not having quite understood the first time around (the blend English voices/French text wasn't exactly helpful)... and it already reminds me of the ending, and that I am so going to cry at the end. Again. XD (though so many moments make me cry... I swear, it really has drawn me in like never before).

And I wonder: will I ever be able to write a story as compelling? Will I ever get it done? Whichever stage I finally reach, I want to at least be able to say: I tried. But rather will I say: I succeeded, and I'm not done succeeding.

And so we reach week two for Aeva, which means: writing! :D now, I looked through my files and found only one worthy of sharing. I decided to share the entire (incomplete) thing, even if the starting character isn't Aeva... but the fact is they will deal with one another on a regular base. As this writing dates back a few years though, parts of it may have become obsolete, but the tone and character depictions remain in my eyes correct.

As for the scenes themselves, they happen sometime after Nadieja's meeting with Seres and the subsequent danger Erjin encountered, only to be rescued in more ways than one. As you can see, yes, I've started lingering about a specific place in my world XD I guess I just like it there. Next month I will take us to the Empire, but shh, still a couple weeks left to go ;)

Theme 09: Aeva - Week 1

Doesn't happen often that I get so fed up with someone I simply block them - in fact, it hasn't happened in my 'more mature' years, and the list of FB blocked people was 3 people long - one dating back 5 years ago, another from about that same time, and a third who was spam. I think.

Yet today I had to block someone again. It's a weird feeling for someone who's all about trying to make people understand my points and discuss problems... but what do you do with someone who simply. Refuses. To. Listen. There's so much to say, so much negative, that I'm gonna stop myself right here. I don't like giving up on people since it goes again my need to be helpful - at the same time, that exact need is unhealthy. At some point, you have to be capable of saying enough is enough, and to move on.

It's an important lesson to learn when you like to help people: sometimes, you just can't. Sometimes, only mistakes can make a person learn and grow, and this growth will have to happen beyond your control. I noticed I was starting to take over that person's bad habits, which is really weird for me since I'd though I'd stopped being a sponge... Apparently not. So, lesson learned.

Moving on! Had some trouble determining which character I was going to talk about next, and I figured since we're still in Malmern, why not stay there. So I picked one that'll be fun to talk about because I get to introduce another race :D...

Aeva

New pic ftw! :D

Who is Aeva?

Aeva was born somewhere around Midri, one of the three towns surrounding Malmern. Midri is home to many an alchemist and experiment, to shady dealers and dealings, and the Elvin town most socially apt Wyr call home.

Aeva is one of the Wyr race; the Wyr are majoritarily Human-looking beastshifters. Called werewolves and werewairs in olden times when the Wyr and the Vampires waged a long-fought war in the shadows, the Wyr are not the bloodthirsty beasts some Humans depicted them as. The Wyr are both Human and animal; most are either wolf, wair or bear, with matching personalities - wolves are social loners, wairs territorial and caring, and bears strong and cunning. They are neither bloodthirsty nor primitive, and Aeva is an excellent example of the Wyr's intellect.

Aeva herself was born wolf, raised wolf, and taught by a paranoid father to use her 'Human half' only to avoid detection. She was still young when he attacked Midrins and was caught, hung in Midri's outskirts by a hind paw, and skinned alive. Wolf Aeva saw this with her very own eyes, frightening her into her Human form... but her eyes never reverted from their animalistic yellow shine, making her stand out immediately in a crowd. An alchemist found her and decided to keep her - in the beginning as a pet, later on as a full-fledged apprentice with unfortunately little understanding of the craft... but give her tools, and she could fix his apparatuses with relative ease.

This interest in machinery is what led Aeva to one day attend the Dogren festival in Malmern - a grand festival where the Dogren, a race of Humanoid mountain people seemingly carved our of rock itself, showcase their inventions and grant the most interesting of requests made by the Malmernian. There she ran into racist Honorary who stirred up trouble, and Aeva turned wolf and attacked one of them... leading her to be arrested and thrown in jail, where she would have awaited an inevitable death sentence for being a 'threat to society' (a laughable notion to be sure, but one the Malmernian would eat up in those dire times), were it not for one Elvin woman who saw past appearances and decided to not only release her, but offer her the opportunity to become one of many hands of justice...

Aeva and the novel

Aeva's role is as of yet undefined; she is still in construction phase, so I've yet to discover the depths of her personality. She, like Devon, will play a part in the protection of Malmern's innocents, and I have sensed already that they won't get all too well along (I've speculated that he has been in the thick of the Vampire/Wyr war in the past, and that he's seen enough of the Wyr to feel uncomfortable (and I'm sure there are more personal reasons but he's telling me to leave him alone << XD)).

Aeva has no qualms with anyone, even not with the people who do her harm. She does not hate, nor does she judge by appearances alone. This makes her an invaluable asset in the grand scheme of things, as she may be one of few voices who will take Aneskia's defense once the going gets rough and events start piling up. She does believe in the greater good but to a certain degree - she will always try and see beyond the obvious, to think of all possible ramifications, quite as her master has taught her with alchemy: never stop at what you know, even if the unknown may kill you.

I haven't said much about her involvement in the story huh XD still working on it... but I wanted to present the Wyr, who are basically my take on werewolves :) kind of happened naturally, as I already had a Wyr years ago, but I just didn't know it yet. In those days I just called him a gargoyle and thought: hey, shapeshifting, cooooool XD defining the Wyr happened as I started working on the world's history, and discovered certain events that happened tens of thousands of years ago. ^^

And that is all. For now. << XD

Theme 08: Erjin - Week 4

Today I feel overwhelmed. Been up for an hour, feel like the world's too much to bear. Interestingly enough, this feeling occurred after I shared a personal post by someone I watch on DA - wondering how people on my FB will react to it, if at all. I'm always the one wondering how people will react because I always feel like I'm supposed to be a specific person (and by 'always' I mean, whenever I feel out of sync with myself); or wondering whether people who can relate to the post will be upset over it. I don't know. I think I simply think/feel too much. Like everything, it'll pass.

Other things worthy of mention:

- I got a cool drawing idea for Nalyn last night; I think that's what I'll be doing right after I try and decrease my DA backlog;

- I made a Tumblr; it'll likely serve about the same purpose as the Facebook page, except with less random/unfinished writings, and more cat photos.

And here we are at week 4! This week, a continuation of Week 2, and an encounter that changed Erjin's perspective of the world and some of its inhabitants...

Theme 08: Erjin - Week 3

So many things thought, so little able to say.

I've been suffering from "de-synchronization' lately; what this means is that I don't feel in sync with myself, and that I feel as though I react in 'wrong' ways (like being overly talkative, not thinking my words through as much,...) because of it. It may seem like a silly problem from a distance, but what it does is affect every part of my life and make me be someone else than me. As such, everything I enjoy (especially writing) has been a struggle I'm barely willing to undertake... Even needed a prolonged break from ProjectComment because I was losing my grip on things. I think a blend of current world/national events and a multitude of projects has made my inner circuits fry. So, I just try and keep going forward and listen way more to my wants than what I know I need, since they seem to balance themselves out anyway (as in, I can have a hunkering for a really good burger, but at the same time I'm eating less and feeling disgusted by fries). I can never explain why I'm the way I am... so I won't try to. Just go with the flow and, more importantly, trust this is but a faze (because that's exactly what I know it is). Usually, feeling like crap means there's some evolution afoot.

And we're on Week 3 (noooooooooooo), which means actual thought has to go into the post (aaaahhhhhhhhhhhh). Which sucks for me right now XD (eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee) but... well, let's try and make this worthwhile anyway.

Erjin's Origin Story

Thing is, I already mentioned in Week 1's entry how and why Erjin came to be. There isn't really much more to say about her origin story, since that's basically it XD

However, I can say more about her secondary origin story; as in, why did I keep this blog-centric character and how did she evolve into an actual character whose existence has many ramifications relating to other characters and the story itself.

How it all started I no longer remember, but what it started with is a blog entry:

Day xx,

I do not know where to begin.

I have been unable to think for the past weeks. Were it not for everyone's support, even Lomalia's, I... I cannot say. I've cried many times in Janty's arms, who has been as kind to me as ever. They have all given me some time away, and I have stayed home since... since then.

I... witnessed a murder. The culprit bit a Honorary's neck to shreds. I was there when it happened. The man monster swiftly passed through the crowd, and came before me on all fours, gaping at me with blood clotting his face. I thought he was going to attack me. I thought... I, I thought I was going to die. The monster screeched at me and that is when the Honorary managed to subdue him by impaling him with a couple of lances. Harmed, but not killed, and later taken away to be imprisoned, questioned and... executed ? I try not to think of his sentence. I... am thankful to still be alive, and surrounded by friendly faces. This is the first evening I am capable of being alone. And picking up a quill. I have been trying to remove the image from my mind, the sound of his voice and the madness in his eyes by trying and establish the monster's race. With no books at my disposal, I have to rely solely on my memory, which appears to be dreadful at this time. I... can't stop thinking about the blood and the screams and those eyes, those bloodshot eyes, telling me I was going to be next. And then I fainted after he'd been taken away, to awake in my own bed, a hand held carefully by Janty. And I... I'm not going to sleep. I can't. His screech still echoes in my ears and I can't block out the sound and the horror and________________

This scene occurs before the writing in Week 2. It is what set a series of writings in motion, and that insidiously transformed Erjin from a blog-centric book rat, to a character who is part of the world at large. It will also explain part of Erjin's questions to a certain someone in Week 4's entry (just one more week to wait ;) ). But, this was a turning point in Erjin's evolution, and what made her a true character rather than just a narrative voice. Her secondary origin story, if you will :)

Before then I had been building her personality here and there, having decided she was a clumsy girl with a physical handicap (because I have too few of those), Elven, wearing glasses, sporting a pigtail (because I have no one who wears their hair like that XD), with freckles... you know, basic stuff. Only the handicap is special, as is the way it has been partially 'fixed' (dying to know what it is yet? XD), and this handicap gave me a rough idea of her backstory (which I'm honestly still working on). Figured she's smart and pretty good at finding logical connections between facts, and like many high IQ people: she's hopelessly impractical, bordering on appearing stupid (not to forget being clumsy and having burned irreplaceable books before). One may wonder why she hasn't been fired yet, and the main reason is: she unwittingly has friends in high places. This friend knows Erjin's mind is a useful one, and in the dark times ahead people like her will be necessary... 

But that is a story for another time. I leave you with another old blog entry, that might sound familiar if you've read Week 2's writing. This came before the writing itself, and with a few more entries after this one until I stopped the blog entirely, it set the stage for 5 writings that would make me determine enough about Malmern and some of its people to know it had to have a big part in TAoS. It all led to many discoveries and character building, as well as recently realizing there's a large-scale excavation going on to Malmern's west, deep in the H'Jen Desert...

There is no normalcy

The screams have all but faded away. I dream again of book-filled towers and flying pages eating one another. I have been told this manner of recurring dream is quite normal for young librarians, that it will disappear in time. These dreams are a welcome distraction, however. Sometimes, the Varyi's eyes still peer at me out of dark corners. I have been told that the Varyi has been executed. I should feel relieved. I suppose that, one day, I will.

I researched this race extensively for weeks. Certain authors depict the Varyi as ancient creatures descended from the Blood God Batetsu, of whom I've never heard; others believe the Varyi originate from the Malmernian area, and were created through experimentation by Lord Varyi, hence their name; yet others believe the Varyi are beings cursed by magic or ancient artefacts. And yet more believe they are but another race among many. My greatest breakthrough came a few nights ago, as I returned home quite late... and a little tipsy, to tell the truth. Oliver, the Honorary who saved my life, had stopped by the Library to invite me for a drink. I was stupefied. It goes without saying I am not used to the whole dating process. I was flattered and, to be entirely honest, I wondered whether a drink might actually relieve some of the stress I was still experiencing from the Varyi attack. We went to the Two Horns, a reputable establishment used to serving the Honorary. Our evening started out quite pleasantly, as we got to know each other... but it became eventually clear, despite the buzz in my head, that Oliver was here solely to drink the memories away. I suppose he had asked me to join him only to clear his own conscience. When I asked him to walk me home, he broke down in tears and screams answered by a couple of Honorary who'd been watching him since we'd entered the tavern. They proposed to take me home, but Oliver saw it as his duty to do so himself. I suppose I believed he could protect me as he already had, or that no one would dare attack a Honorary again.

We were ambushed as we rounded a corner. At first I thought the ugly bald human intended to rob us. Oliver called him Kal; Kal complained to Oliver that the Varyi had been executed, whereas Oliver complained they should have done a better job of keeping the Varyi captive. As the conversation escalated in hushed tones and I began to sober up, I comprehended the situation at hand. And I wondered in a heartbeat: had Oliver harmed the Varyi to protect me, or to protect himself from eventual suspicion ? The Varyi had been defending itself. Perhaps it never had the intention to harm anyone, let alone kill another person. This Kal, however, had every intention to, and mentionned to Oliver that I knew too much. Before I realized the predicament I was in, Kal was upon me. Rot and liquor filled my nose as his one hand gripped my neck. I couldn't scream, and Oliver's strength paled in comparison to Kal's.

In all honesty... part of me wanted to die, that evening. Irrationally, I blamed myself for the Varyi's execution. Perhaps it was a just return for my dark wishes regarding the Tellians. Perhaps I hated life too much, and I had been heard. My thoughts were quite jumbled that night, and I wondered whether I might finally meet my parents after I died. Then Kal's grip loosened and I fell to the floor. I gripped the cobblestones when I realized I still lived. A shrill, drawn-out hiss came from beside me: a man, half the size of this Kal, who tossed him aside as though he were but a weightless ragdoll. The man shrieked like a beast enraged and I realized immediately that this man was a Varyi. Everything went black. I only remember dreaming of feathered Varyi with sharp elongated teeth, hugging one another.

When I came to, I was home. The Varyi, who had remained by my side all night long, introduced himself as... ... 

Theme 08: Erjin - Week 2

Seems like I lose track of a lot of things lately... Blog included. Though I do use the weekend to spend time with bf since he's at home then, and yesterday was partial-cleaning time XD and tomorrow I've got a job interview, and no idea what to expect of it. Just wish I didn't have to take the train, since it's gonna make me lose some time waiting for it... but I'll have Pokémon Go to keep me company. Yay mobile data. << XD

This week, going to share one of those random writings that set an entire part of the story in motion. As I mentioned in week 1, Erjin was created so I'd have a book-person in the world itself from whom to learn, and that eventually evolved into actual stor-setting events I never saw coming. There are five older writings based on a single once-journal entry, and I pick the one I aptly dubbed 'Because it demanded to be written out'. The scene is set with Erjin being asked out by a Honorary, which is basically the equivalent of military in Malmernian terms, and after a rather tumultuous evening at the tavern, the young Honorary walks Erjin home...