30/04 - Pain, bis

Today's bad: still in pain. On top of my left knee'growing bruise and my right thigh's blockage, my lower back started hurting something fierce. I also felt light-headed and absent, which is likely due to yesterday's fall. I'm good, though.

Seriously though: ow.

Today's good: played some Heroes 6 (yay Sanctuary :D), concluded NaPoWriMo, and resisted the urge to write this post tomorrow XD

Note to Future Self: perseverance 1 - laziness sorta 0.

29/04 - The pain @.@

Today's bad: I fell with my scooter. It was raining, I take a road that's apparently overly smooth when wet, and boom! My left knee's thick, my right thigh sore, and I'm working tomorrow. I've already called my manager to let him know I might have a problem tomorrow, but he'd be glad if I can come and sit at the register. I hope I can @.@

Today's good: the scooter's fine, the bottle I'd bought as well. And I didn't break anything, thank goodness e.e oh, and I didn't end up beneath the wheels of an incoming pick-up truck. Now that was very good.

Note to Future Self: next time it rains, take another road.

28/04 - dare I say it?

Today's bad: welp, I'm tired! Surprise surprise. I don't need to read my posts over to know it's become a leitmotiv.

Today's good: still happy at my job, which is worth mentioning after all these "tired" posts. It's temporary. Once I have my regular 28-hours weeks again, things will improve. For now, I try to get in as much creativity as I can (this said, I'm gonna dive into Persona 4)

Note to Future Self: you stand where you're supposed to.

Late 27/04 - Blank

The day's bad: I honestly have no idea anymore... It's all a haze of tiredness.

The day's good: I do remember doing some writing.

Note to Future Self: write these before you're overtired.

26/04 - Pain and oh god work again tomorrow noooooooo

Today's bad: woke up dizzy, exhausted, after seven hours of sleep despite needing more. Four days of work ahead - I'm sore, my skin's raw in places from clothes' chafing, and I don't know when I'll go back to the hours I signed up for as we're still one worker short. More than anything, I miss the energy to be creative.

Today's good: caught up with napowrimo, had an idea for a new DeviantID so I hired bf to be my photographer XD (contrast upped afterwards).

The idea came as I wrote this:

So, I picked the cards best representing who I am, and ran with the idea. Pretty happy with the result. It's me without showing me, as I find my outer appearance to have little to do with the world residing within (that and my hair's horrible and my nose has this red dot and dear god my eyebrows are seriously growing larger!). So uh yeah. The truth lies in the cards ;)

Note to Future Self: allow me to FB this for ya:

Late 25/04 - Braincrash

The day's bad: got up at 5.30am, worked til 1.30pm, got home ate bathed, slept, back up at 6pm, got dressed (surprisingly faster than bf who had the entire afternoon to figure out his clothes), left at 6.30, went to benefit dinner, got home at 1am, slept.

The day's good: oh god the food at the benefit was delicious.

Note to Future Self: better wait than rush and regret.

24/04 - Belgium's got talent :D

Today's bad: got made to feel that my current job's worth less than my previous one. There's no comparison; and though it's true I still miss part of the previous one, my current one's better for at least the fact I never have to work alone. As I like all my colleagues, every day's fun - even when, like tomorrow, I gotta get up at 5.30.

Also, 5th day in a row, 4th early shift of the week. I'm spent. Sunday I'm at home, but Monday it's early shift again, as is Tuesday... As my job's not creatively stimulating, and I've been too tired to do anything at home, this is starting to get on my nerves. Can't wait to go back to a 4-day week.

Today's good: Belgium's got talent was aaaaaaaaawesome :D we don't usually vote, but tonight we did for the most amazing dancing couple! And the guy proposed to his girlfriend after their performance, it was sooooo romantic. I cried, cuz, y'know: woman XD. Anyway, I hope they'll win!

On vous souhaite la victoire :)

Note to Future Self: one more day.

23/04 - Territory

Today's bad: still gotta go work, hence the early post (and early shift tomorrow, so tonight I won't have much time). Also, my cat defended his territory earlier ^^ heard super loud meowing and, when I went to look, I found him nearly nose to nose with a rogue cat we've been seeing for a couple of weeks now. And orange/beige fur everywhere (my cat's black & white). I guess it counts as bad because he could get really hurt this way, but, cats will be cats. Even the spayed kitten defends his territory <<

Today's good: some progress!

Taking the time to explain some things and delve into the brain. It's what I was missing. And I am indeed going to change the way one of the most important encounters in her life occurs, as it was still largely based on events of times long passed and just doesn't work anymore. So. Yay for progress! Even if it's still not the story itself XD but, well, I need to know my characters, especially if they relate to the story I want to tell.

Note to Future Self: nothing for today.

22/04 - Meh day

Today's bad: on top of not writing due to tired, I'm pretty stuck with it. I don't know which way to go with the story, and the characters aren't being helpful. And I was so looking forward to this part o.-

Today's good: I'm up to date with NaPoWriMo, and the turkey slices I bought at work were quite tasty. Working at a supermarket has its advantages XD also, feeling the urge to draw. Might finish one of the pics I posted a couple of months ago sometime soon?

Remember him?

Note to Future Self: less talk, more do.

21/04 - Dragon :D

Today's bad: nearly forgot the blog XD

Today's good: finally saw Maleficent! It's definitely different from Disney's Sleeping Beauty, and it has some nice plot twists... and a Dragon :D overall an enjoyable movie, even if I missed the epic Dragon battle from the animated movie. Oh well. After playing Kingdom Hearts, there's only one Maleficent for me: the evil Dragon-shifting witch ;) although this Maleficent pleased me as well, thanks to Angelina's performance. She so owned the role.

Wings! Horns! :D

Note to Future Self: ... Dragons. <3

20/04 - Quiet day

Today's bad: didn't get as much writing done as I'd wanted, but...

Today's good: ... got some writing done anyway :)

It's a bit of a difficult place right now. I'd had everything planned out, and I'm trying to follow the same storyline as in the first draft, but something's just not feeling right. On the whole, what I'm doing now makes more sense, but I have an encounter issue.

I don't known quite where to go from where I am. Full re-write, partial changes, complete overhaul of the main idea? Yeah, I think I made my encounter happen way too soon. Oh well. I'll figure something out.

Note to Future Self: let loose, relax, you'll figure it out.

19/04 - Hauling

Today's bad: despite working only 5 hours, it felt like so much more because I 1) hauled a large amount of beer bottles, 2) then a large amount of fruit and vegetables, and 3) well the clean-up was pretty quick, since we had our weekend help. My right arm hurts and it's already been happening that I wake up in the night because it's sleeping... but, compensating with some valerian to ensure deeper sleep. It's working well.

Today's good: was gona write, but I got stuck to the tv and Persona 4 << (which is ironic if you know the game). It's proving to be far more fun than I expected. Now all I need is Persona Q, and 5 once it comes out.

Also, been doing much thinking while gaming, and I know how to continue my writing, which is for tomorrow. Along with catching up on NaPoWriMo again XD doesn't help that Steph's been home all week, I spend time with him instead of my PC. Poor Pc. It misses me. XD

Note to Future Self: relax and let it flow.

18/04 - Yup

Today's bad: got a spot of migraine, which made the last few hours annoying. Got home, took an excedryn, tomorrow I'll be fitter.

Today's good: nothing specific... The day's over? XD

Note to Future Self: quiet day.

17/04 - meow? Meow meow!

Today's bad: dear god tired. Not surprising? Not surprising.

Today's good: well, I beat Yukiko's shadow in Persona 4 today << it's a good thing. For me. Cuz. Gamer. Y'know. Oh, and I'm working tomorrow afternoon instead of morning. Sleepies! Woohoo!

Also, have a cutie:

Note to Future Self: you have a right to be yourself, in all situations.

16/04 - Glasses

Today's bad: didn't get enough time to write, though I'm still gonna try to get some done before dinner. Also, I think I might need reading glasses. They'd mentioned a possible need for it when I'd gone for a medical exam for work, and today it was mentioned again as we went for Steph's glasses. I do feel fatigue at the PC, and we do a lot of screen-watching. My eye-sight may be near-perfect, I don't want to take chances.

Today's good: got caught up with NaPoWriMo, and tiny bit of writing done:

Still have some difficulty getting into my writing, but, I'm starting to understand what that means - generally that what I have is wrong, or boring (it does happen), or I need to go a different way. So I create new characters, quite simple ones, but that can give some insight into world and culture (and die without my caring too much *ahem*). So, yeah. I like to change PoVs a lot. It generally means adapting the writing style to the character's vocabulary or way of speech, and that's so much fun. With, y'know, lasting characters << XD

Note to Future Self: glasses, good idea.

15/04 - Oldies and cleansies

Today's bad: didn't get to write. The day's not done yet, but I know it won't happen nonetheless. But...

Today's good: I'm feeling satisfied. We got up early, started cleaning the living room, let the kitty outside (he loved it), got some Persona 4 in (died 4 times, couldn't believe it... I just freaking started o.-), then we cleaned up some more and even got some order on the second floor. Then we pulled out an oldie I didn't know was here:

Aside from losing because I was sitting on the wrong side of the couch, it was fun ^^ now I need to get my PS1 memory cards, as I discovered you can't save on a PS2 card. Le sad.

Oh, and, we took some time to sit outside in our yard to enjoy the sunlight while the floors were drying. It was so warm and good. Yay spring! And my lilac bush is growing nicely, perhaps in a couple of years it'll yield flowers ^^

Note to Future Self: cleaning up the environment was a necesary step towards creativity.

14/04 - Soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur...

Today's bad & Today's good: yes. Today is one of those days where the good and the bad are basically one and the same. We'd decided to spay our youngest cat, and today was the day. You've got the just before...

(cute, ain't he <3)

And the right after we got home and lay him down to sleep the anesthesia off...

(not so cute anymore)

He looks totally dead, but he's breathing peacefully. He should be fine in a few hours. In the meantime, he's goldfishing. ... and damn is it creepy. But, starting tomorrow (or later on, depending on how he feels), he'll finally get to go outside. He is (was?) too curious a kitty to allow him to leave, and he showed little interest for it anyway... I hope he'll at least feel like going into the yard. I need to mop the floor.

Note to Future Self: yes it's sad, but it is and will always be the right decision for him.

13/04 - Sleep .________.

Today's bad: so tired. So long day. Sleep.

Today's good: Persona 4 arrived! ^^

Note to Future Self: too tired.

Late 12/04 - wut?

The day's bad: obviously forgetting about the blog entirely? Only now realized it.

The day's good: restaurant for father-in-law's birthday, and latef in the day Tales from the Borderlands << tried the demo and I was hooked.

Note to Future Self: yes, it was a good day.

11/04 - Writes and waits

Today' bad: got out of work 30 minutes late, but globally satisfied. Woll have to ask if these extra hours are paid or something, cuz in a single month I got nearly two of them XD

Today's good: I wrote this morning! Which is great in itself, but what's better is that the flow was excelent :D wish I hadn't had to work today, but oh well. One page in an hour, and something I feel like re-reading. I am so happy!

Note to Future Self: your job makes you happy. So much you could cry at times (crazy, ain't it). These are things that just happen, sometimes. Bad days mean good things on the way!

10/04 - Long day again

Today's bad: worked. Tired. So tired. Would've written, but will HoMM6 instead.

Today's good: a funny anecdote: I'm busy putting articles away, and I'm asked whether we still have a specific type of may that wasn't on the shelf anymore; lo and behold, that was exactly the item I was holding a pack of. The lady was so happy she thanked me profusely ^^

Note to Future Self: coffee bad. Coffee good, but coffee bad. Keep away.

Late 09/04 - Crap day

The day's bad: title says it all.

The day's good: went to McDonald's, had a Chicken Cajun, was delicious.

Note to Future Self: FNERRR!

08/04 - Dear god that cat's getting on my nerves

Today's bad: aside from the cat's constant whining driving me nuts, I'm globally pissed off. I give up on getting this house cleaned. I just don't care anymore.

Today's good: I wrote. A little - well, a lot, if you consider the three poems and random blurb.

I dunno what it's about. I guess my frustrations. Or something. I don't like today, despite having been creative. I feel the need to cry and throw things, which won't happen of course because I like the stuff we have. But I feel so... disheartened. Knowing nothing's going to improve, I see no point trying anymore - all I want is to crawl into my shell, my little world, and stay there.

Note to Future Self: communication. Both sides. Do it. This is gonna get worse.

07/04 - Cats and facts

Today's bad: Spider-Cat got stuck.

Ehhhh this ain't the way to Kansas...

See, he's not allowed outside yet, as he still has staples in his side (the wound has healed nicely and he's full of energy... obviously), but the weather is soooo nice I wanted some fresh air in the living room. So, I opened one side of the window, and kept the shutters closed.

Unsurprisingly, mister here jumped up at the shutters, and at the window, and crawled all along the shutters behind the closed window... and then, I heard no real noise anymore save for 'mrowwww'... Yup, stuck kitty cat. The problem is that this side of the window's basically stuck, so, I had to pull on it, and luckilly he managed to crawl out on his own. Then I shut the window. :( XD

Today's good: I was again reminded of how I've grown as a person in the last, oh, 7 or so years. And how that is something to be proud of and consider as an achievement. Kind of interesting to see how you can know another person better than they know themselves, as well. Ahh, old wounds, old scars, old certainties, and always new ways to colour them in and make them beautiful. There's always a bit of disappointment that remains towards the source of the scar, even a little bit of anger, but remembering that my scars are nowhere near as vast and ugly as the source's puts things in perspective. You live, you learn, you look back and then turn towards the future once more, and take a step. I, at least, am free to do so.

Note to Future Self: ... you took my words there with your good.

06/06 - Moons and toons

Today's bad: god I had a creepy nightmare. The dream was normal enough that I really 4hought I was awake, up until some kind of meteor appeared to be heading towards earth. When it came close enough... turns out it was the moon from Majora's Mask.

(so much creepier in-game - you know it if you've played it)

I just can't recall if it was the N64 version I saw (which is the one I played back in the day, and still own because duh), or this one, but one thing for sure: that one up above captures the essence of the blight that was gonna befall the earth. I woke up shortly before it was to hit the earth.

It did remind me of something: I got a bad feeling about 2016. Or, rather, about reaching 2016, and in that dream I mentioned that. Not that we'll have a moon crashing XD but, something unpleasant still has to happen, on a global scale. I'll be happy if that feeling's proven wrong.

Today's good: you know how you can plan your day, and then the day ends and somehow other things happened? In our case, it was Borderlands'S Claptastic voyage - which is fun save for the last boss. When you jump in the fight and die even before reaching the ground, that's no longer fun. So, we started a new campaign with the new characters, and that's about it.

Note to Future Self: need to write and go on DA. And catch up on NaPoWriMo.

Late 05/05 - Such a long, long day x.x

The day's bad: well, obviously, I didn't get to my blog. Not that I forgot: I worked early shift on Easter and then we went to my parents-in-law to celebrate it. It was nearly 10Pm when we got home. I said: screw it, I need to sleep. I wanted to write a decent post, and it wouldn't have happened.

Oh, and, I realized I already forgot about NaPoWriMo. Daily writing isn't quite compatible with daily activities. Still, maybe I can catch up...

The day's good: had fun at the parents-in-law's :) coffee, cupcakes-in-a-mug, playing cards (my team won X3), and crepes. My brain couldn't do the short memory thing anymore, but I could still play well XD and we got easter eggs :D

Note to Future Self: better late than not, beter good than botched.

04/04 - Sleep required

Today's bad: tired. Need to catch up sleep. Spent 4 hours this morning at the register, non-stop. But my bread was great.

Today's good: we splurged: Dragon Age, Far Cry 4 and, unexpectedly, Persona 4 Arena (which was a total bargain... Now all I need is Persona 4 << )

Note to Future Self: brain shutdown imminent, in 3... 2... 1...

03/04 - Mistakes and expectations

Today's bad: dear god the mistakes I made at work. Baking bread twice, adding sugar at the wrong time... I almost cried from feeling like the biggest idiot in the world. The learning curve on the bread baking is pretty steep for me; but, later, I noticed a price mistake and informed my supervisor. That was good. Tomorrow has got to go smoother... and I need better sleep.

Today's good: my parents came by at work, then stopped by at home, mother-in-law came as well, and we had coffee and absolutely delicious cake I bought at work. ^^

Also, bf's offered to give me the deluxe edition of Dragon Age Inquisition, as it's on sale right now. ... so hard to say no >> bog unicorn! Just need to make sure the game's in English first.

Note to Future Self: mistakes are human. You live, you learn, your brain processes the information, and you get better. Remember your previous job: it took more than two weeks to get good at it! And you're already pretty good at everything, it's jusg the bread. Just the bread. You're doing great.

02/04 - Long day ahead

Today's bad: well I'm posting this super early because I know it won't be happening tonight: I'm working til 7.15, and tomorrow is the early shift, which means getting up at 5.30. I've also slept poorly and gotten woken up several times (including by bf and by the cat jumping for the doorknobs), so I don't expect much out of today.

Also, I dreamt about a giant wave crashing down and drowning everything. For some reason, Benoit Poelvoorde made a cameo in my weirdass dream. Somehow, we survived by swimming to the surface at some point. Then it was kitty wakey time.

Today's good: well, so far, it's getting my morning coffee, and seeing the kitchen counter nearly spotless clean (had a cleaning urge yesterday evening, was crazy). It's the only place in the house that clean - for now. After working with someone lacking structure and insight, my brain demanded some form of balancing out. That was it. Plus, from working in an irreproachable environment, you start wanting the same thing at home.

Oh, and I dreamt about one of my characters last night. I was his mother (which, considering the actual mother, isn't flattering for me at all). It's the strangest thing how you can feel guilt for the lives your characters have, even though they're the ones telling you what you envision is accurate. Since I'm a little crazy, I view these characters a bit like friends, and that poor kid has suffered. And perhaps there's yet other reasons I dreamt about this, I don't know; last thing I remember, before getting brutally woken by bf getting up, was that I was on the phone with him and asking how his day had been. My brain's still trying to figure this out, but without all of the bg story between mother and kid, can't really explain why this is so weird (and I so don't feel like explaining right now).

Note to Future Self: ... I wanna go back to bed ;.;

01/04 - Cats and words

Today's bad: the cat woke me at 7:22 AM exactly o.- somehow, the door to the upstairs was open, and he meowed and ugh. Damn those door-opening cats.

Today's good: so, writing.

Only three or so pages, which might seem like little in about three hours, but the thinking process is slow. And, I got distracted by Deviantart. But yay writing :X (and I'm already seeing something I'll change =.= )

Note to Future Self: day well spent.